So much happens in recovery

Time sort of slows down and speeds up in recovery. So much seem to change in such a short period of time.

One of my loved ones relapsed. I used to feel only anger. Now I feel compassion and sadness, because I know it is borne of pain and that horrible ache of loneliness that only alcoholics know. Luckily the relapse seems to be nipped in the bud this time, but I can only prey it doesn't happen again. The true meaning of powerlessness and helplessness I now know.

I opened up about it in an AA meeting and was touched how people care. I have been trying so hard to share for the new comer that I forgot to open up and ask for help. When I did the hand of AA was there.

I had two cigarettes tonight and made a call to an old destructive flame (hung up before I spoke to him). There, I have admitted it. Admit your faults to Him and to your fellows. I don't feel good about it but tomorrow is a another day and it is a day at a time.

Am listening to the best of the Cure.

Yesterday I got so old I felt like I could die.
Yesterday I felt so old I felt Like I could cry.

I am very tired....

I love that line: Yesterday I felt so old I felt